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Permission to Be Different
Permission Denied: Your Guide to Breaking Free from Approval-Seeking - Dr. Diva's Fierce Truth
Dr. Diva Verdun
November 15, 2024
When was the last time you asked yourself for permission instead of others? After 50, it's time to realize that the only approval you've ever needed has been waiting patiently within you all along.
From the moment we enter this world, society hands us a script—a detailed manual of how to be a "proper" woman. Mother, wife, daughter, sister, community member—each role comes with its own set of expectations, restrictions, and unspoken rules. Like our mothers and grandmothers before us, we've spent decades trying to squeeze ourselves into these pre-fabricated molds.
But here's the revolutionary truth: You were never meant to fit in. You were meant to stand out.
The High Cost of Seeking Approval
Think about it: How many dreams have you postponed? How many desires have you dismissed? How many parts of yourself have you hidden—all in the pursuit of others' approval? This constant seeking of external validation isn't just exhausting; it's soul-crushing.
The most profound realization comes when we understand that:
Only you can breathe your breath
Only you can nourish your body
Only you can fulfill your purpose
Only you can live your life
Breaking Free: Your Declaration of Independence
The transformation begins with a simple yet powerful decision: choosing yourself. Here's how to start:
Recognize the Pattern
Notice when you're seeking approval
Identify whose voice is really speaking when you doubt yourself
Acknowledge the old patterns that no longer serve you
Reclaim Your Authority
Start making decisions without consulting everyone
Trust your inner wisdom
Practice saying "This is what works for me"
Release the Guilt
Let go of the need to explain your choices
Accept that not everyone will understand
Embrace the discomfort of growth
The Power of Being Different
Every great achievement in history came from someone who dared to be different. They stepped outside the "societal bubble" and charted their own course. Your difference isn't just acceptable—it's essential.
Your Permission Slip to Freedom
Here's your truth: Those who demand you conform to their expectations are often those who haven't found the courage to live authentically themselves. Their disapproval is more about their fears than your choices.
Taking Action: Your Freedom Framework
Start with these daily practices:
Question one "should" each day
Make one decision without seeking advice
Celebrate one unique aspect of yourself
Take one action that feels true to you, regardless of others' opinions
The Age with Power Perspective
At 50+, you've earned the right to live life on your terms. You've spent decades learning, growing, and understanding what works for you. Now is the time to use that wisdom to create your own rules.
Moving Forward
This week, notice every time you seek permission or approval. Ask yourself: "What would I do if I already had all the permission I needed?" Then, do that very thing.
Remember: The world needs your unique voice, your distinctive perspective, and your singular way of being. The only permission you need to be different is your own.
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